MegaCorporation CHAANK ARMAMENTS is the world’s leader in weapon’s manufacturing and development. Their latest experiment in cybernetically enhanced super soldiers is a complete failure; resulting in the deaths of dozens of civilians. As a result, the newly appointed CEO, Hayen Cale decides to terminate the contract of the one responsible: Jake Dante. Unfortunately, Jake doesn’t take this news lightly and unleashes his latest project – a death machine called the War Beast – into the building with the intention of slaughtering everyone involved in his termination. Cale, along with a band of coworkers and misfits, must now find a way out of the building before it’s too late.
(Non-Spoiler) Review:
I have a soft spot for these weird B-Movies that existed during the mid 80s to late 90s. Especially when they involve killer machines and practical effects. I don’t know what it is that I love about them. I just know that I do.
1984’s Chopping Mall is the best example I can think of when describing this sub-genre. It’s just a bunch of clunky robots rolling about, killing everything in their path. It’s silly, it’s absurd, and it’s a lot of fun to watch.
Death Machine falls into that same absurdity pool that birthed Chopping Mall. You’d think a movie about a giant killer machine that resembles a walking bear-trap covered in Raptor Talons would be dumb.
And you’d be right. It is dumb, but it is dumb in all the right ways. Okay. Death Machine is this weird, hyperactive work of art that somehow balances horror with insanity.
How do I mean? Well, let me give you an example.
There is a moment in the movie where our villain, Jack Dante (Played by the delightfully entertaining Brad Dourif) is threatening our protagonist Hayden Cale (Ely Pouget). He is trying to blackmail her into sleeping with him to which she responds by putting a gun to his head.
Dante then goes to his knees and continues talking dirty. It is at this point that we realize that to Dante, this is just foreplay. He’s getting off on it. Only when she pulls the hammer back on the gun does he realize that she is serious.
Now, by itself, this scene sounds rather tense. Our hero is dealing with a sick, sexual deviant who clearly gets off on violence. It’s impactful and gives us some insight to how Dante’s twisted little mind works.
But then the scene keeps going. After apologizing for not realizing that it was “Her time of the month.”, Dante raises his arms and runs out of the room while pretending to be an airplane.
I could not make this up even if I tried.
This is only the tip of the insanity ice burg. You have eco-terrorists quoting Street Fighter during combat. Then there are the characters named after famous horror icons (My favorites being a pair named Waylen and Yutani respectively). Then you got the War Beast itself. It is this obscenely gigantic practical puppet that somehow looks as badass as it does ridiculous. And finally you have Brad Dourif himself who chews the scenery as a mouse does cheese.
Seriously, what even is this movie?
I’ll tell you. The movie is Fun. It is well paced, comedically written, enthusiastically weird, and entertaining as hell.
Hello everyone, Mazer here and I would like to take some time talk about the passion of “Middle-Tier” developers. That is, developers of video games who do not make so-called “AAA” titles, but instead these smaller games that tend to reflect their personal interests and passions.
However, I would like to take this time to apologize for our lack of content recently. To make a long story short – things have just been too hectic and too hot for me to sit at my home computer to write. Seriously, it is currently 21:38 as I write this and my phone tells me that it is 105 degrees outside. It’s insane.
That said, I would like to take a moment to share with you this clip from our most recent Live Stream: No More Heroes 3.
No More Heroes is about an otaku named Travis Touchdown who wants to be the world’s best assassin. Why? Well the answer is simple. So he can get laid, of course! I’d go into further detail but that’s a story for another post.
The series is the brain child of Goichi Suda, otherwise known as Suda51. He tends to include his passions into his games; passions such as music, anime, horror movies, and sci-fi. Every one of his games from Lollipop Chainsaw to No More Heroes is just oozing with personality and style. It’s no reason why I love his games. And as of last Friday, I finally completed his latest game: No More Heroes 3.
Now it is a tradition of mine to share my thoughts and feelings on a game during the ending credits. No More Heroes 3 was no exception. This time, however, I went into a little rant concerning my love for auteurs like Suda51. About how their games come from a place of love instead of a cooperate office.
I would like to share that rant with you today. So please, sit back, have a drink, and let’s gush about these passionate, and talented, developers.
Released for the Nintendo Gamecube back in 2003, Gotcha Force is an arena-based fighting game that pits tiny robots (known as Borgs) against one another in hopes to save the Earth. Basically, it’s Autobots vs Decepticons if they were 4 inches tall.
I’ll be honest. I had never even heard of this game until a friend of mine gave it to me as a gift. Unfortunately, like Legend of Dragoon before it, I just never got around to playing it. Frankly, I always thought it was a kid’s game. What with its young protagonists and its child-like aesthetic. Apparently, I was wrong.
My live-stream chat later informed me that the game was not only good, but difficult as well. Curiosity peaked, I decided to make it the next game we finished on stream. Which leads us to the following question. Was it as good as Chat made it out to be or was this another game blinded by nostalgia?
Story
Does Gotcha Force have a story? Yes? I guess? Sort of?
Kidding aside; yes. Gotcha Force has a story. It’s just razor thin. Basically it boils down to a young boy named Kou finding an alien robot named G-Red. G-Red tells Kou that the evil “Death Force” is planning an attack against Earth. It is now up to Kou to find allies in order to create a kid army strong enough to defeat the Dark Emperor.
Along the way Kou meets up with several neighborhood kids. The youngest being (I think) 5 years old and the oldest being a pre-teen? They don’t really give much information about the characters. They just exist to fight alongside you.
Not all kids are friendly; however. There are three brats who, for reasons that I couldn’t figure out, have joined the Death Force. First you have Sho who, for all intents and purposes, is the Gary to your Ash Ketchum. He’s pretty much your rival. Then you have the rich, snobby brat Tama and finally you have the green-haired Orochi whose motivations I really never understood.
Eventually, you win over the hearts and loyalty of the other kids in the neighborhood and together you team up to face the Dark Emperor. The story is nothing special but it serves its purpose.
Gameplay
As we mentioned before, Gotcha Force is an Arena-Based action game. It’s a high-octane 3rd-person action game where you build a team of Borgs to face off against the enemy team. Every Borg comes equipped with 2 special attacks and a melee attack that can combo.
Teams can consist up to 30 Borgs at a time though you’ll be lucky to get upwards of 5 or 6. You see, Borgs cost “GF Points” and you cannot exceed the amount of GF Points you have in your pool. Smaller bots can cost as little as 200 points whereas the bigger, more powerful bots can exceed 1,000 points. You earn GF Points by participating in battles – which this game has in spades. Most battles will net you a few dozen Points whereas boss battles will provide you with much more. Usually in the hundreds.
Oh. Did I mention that Borgs also count as your lives? Yup. The amount of Borgs you bring onto the battlefield count as your life system. When all the Borgs die, you lose.
This adds a whole new level of strategy to the game. Do you want a whole-bunch of little/medium Borgs to maximize your chances of survival? Or do you want a trio of Heavies and hope they deal enough damage to kill the enemy before dying themselves?
Now having a lot of GF Points means nothing if you don’t have Borgs to summon. Luckily, collecting Borgs is as simple as playing the game. At the end of each battle you have a chance to earn one (or more) of the Borgs you just fought against. This either comes in the form of the Borg itself, or capsules that you need to collect in order to form a complete Borg. So you really don’t need to worry about finding Borgs. You’ll soon own more Borgs than you can handle. That is not an exaggeration either. From what I’ve been told, there are about 200 individual Borgs in this game. Each with their own strengths and weaknesses.
That’s pretty damn impressive!
Then there’s the Ally system. During the story-mode you end up teaming up with other neighborhood kids. These kids each have their own specialized team of Borgs that will fight alongside you in battle.
Now each kid has their own unique team. For example, your rival Sho specializes in heavily armed, melee-focused Knights. Tama on the other hand has a single Borg in his team but its a massive skyship that utilizes multiple cannons and lasers to decimate the enemy forces. Another has Jet-themed borgs whereas another has healers. These options allow you to further customize each battle to better your odds at survival.
For the sake of transparency; I will like to mention that there is a Challenge Mode and a Multiplayer Mode that I hadn’t tried. So, unfortunately, I will not be discussing either in this review.
Review
I like Gotcha Force. I like it a lot. This is one of those games that surprises you. It waves its colorful, childish design around before sucker punching you in the gut with its high-octane action and surprising difficulty spikes.
How do I describe my experience? Okay. So during the first half hour or so, the game lures you into this false sense of security. You’re tearing through the enemy Borgs with little to no effort. You’ll be facing maybe 2 enemy Borgs at a time. They each have very little health so it doesn’t take much to destroy them. Then will come the next wave of 2 enemy Borgs and you’d kill them easily as well.
Then, without warning, you’ll be facing upwards of 5 Borgs at a time. Each with mega weapons that cover the screen with bright, flashing colors and particle effects. You’ll watch as your favorite Borg suddenly gets bodied across the arena as if he weighed nothing. Lasers will blast you into oblivion and before you know it, you’ve lost half your team.
I am not exaggerating when I say that there are moments in this game where I can barely keep track of all the insanity that I’m seeing on screen. So many Borgs, so many weapons going off, so many explosions, so many special abilities firing off – it’s pure madness!
I love it.
For you see, these difficulty spikes forced me to reevaluate my Borg team time and time again. There were moments in the game where I felt like I had assembled the perfect team. A team who could destroy my enemies without a second thought.
Only for the Death Force to completely and utterly wipe me out. These new enemy Borgs rendered my tactics completely useless. They chewed me up and spat me out like so much scrap metal.
For this, I was thankful.
You see, it is all too common for me to fall into the trap of using the same group of characters from start-to-finish. It happens all the time – from JRPGs to Fighting Games. I find a team that clicks with me and stick with them until the end.
Gotcha Force forces me to do the opposite. It forced me to experiment with different Borgs – swapping out my Heavies for those with lower armor but higher speed. There was many a time where I eked out a victory thanks to a Borg I previously thought to be useless. This kept the game fresh and exciting.
Unfortunately, we cannot say the same for the game’s Storyline or it’s Voice Acting.
We mentioned before how Gotcha Force’s storyline is bare bones. It is basically the same plot as Power Rangers and Transformers. A force of good turns to kids to help them defeat their evil, almost identical, counterparts. We don’t ever learn why the Death Force is so bad nor do we ever learn the villain’s motivation. Hell, we don’t even communicate with the Dark Emperor until 3/4ths through the game. As such, I found myself spamming the A button to get through what little dialogue Gotcha Force has in order to proceed to the next battle.
The Voice acting is just as rough. Each character has a series of phrases that they repeat ad nauseum. The problem is that these phrases don’t match up with what the characters are saying on screen.
For example; Sho’s dialogue would read “…” but his dialogue would be “YES!”
To which your character says. “Who was that guy” but his voice would say “OH!”
It’s very conflicting. Sure, it’s funny at first but even I found myself rolling my eyes by the end of the game. I am sure this could be due to translation errors or something but either way; it was rough.
The music however, is upbeat and matches the intensity of the gameplay beautifully. I found it catchy and fun. If I had to make a compliant about the soundtrack it would be that there wasn’t much variety in the music. It had four, maybe five real tracks in the game. That said, the music was pleasant to listen too and I enjoyed it quite a bit.
Conclusion
Gotcha Force was a pleasant surprise. I literally thought it was going to a laid-back game designed for kids. A “Babies First Armored Core” if you will.
I’ve never been so wrong. This game is intense! It’s non-stop, adrenaline pumping madness that keeps you on your toes. What surprised me the most was just HOW MUCH content the game throws at you. You get over 100 battles with the chance to collect about 200 Borgs – each having their own unique gameplay style and stats. Not to mention the multiplayer split-screen component and challenge mode. There’s even a trading option to allow you to trade Borgs with your friends!
The graphics are bright and vivid and the gameplay fast and tight. Even with so much happening on screen, I never experienced slowdown or stuttering. The few issues that the game does have (Voice acting and story) are so minute that it never distracts from the game itself.
I give Gotcha Force a 9/10. I highly, HIGHLY recommend Gotcha Force to anyone able to purchase (or emulate) it.
As of this month I have finally sat down to watch season 1 of Hannibal. Now I know what you are asking. Why has it taken you over 11 years to watch this show? Well, I’ll be honest. I just never got around to it. Yes, there is a part of me who wanted to wait until the show had wrapped up but beyond that, I never made time for the show.
I decided to change that. With my Dean Koontz backlog finished and my “Terror on Tubi” list caught up to 550 movies, I figured now would be the best time to pick up on Hannibal.
So I sat my butt down, fired up my Tubi app, and started watching season 1.
At the time of this entry, I am on episode 12 of season one. Just one episode away from the season finale. Honestly? I cannot wait to see how the season wraps up. What started off as a nice, slow burn has evolved into an inferno of manipulation, murder, and mystery. Despite knowing the end result of these characters, I have no idea how this season will end. I cannot wait!
That said, there is something I wanted to discuss. Hence this post.
Let’s call it the Fear of Knowing.
Knowing is Half the Battle
Fear is the unpleasant feeling triggered by the perception of danger whether real of imagined. Is someone following us? Is there something lurking in the shadows? These invasive thoughts work to keep us safe.
As a result, it only makes sense that most horror media focuses on the fear of the unknown. The unknown killer, the mysterious event, the bump in the night. This is what makes horror so effective. We don’t know what’s going on and through that, we are afraid.
But what if we did know? Would that ruin the experience? To that I say, no.
Let’s take a look at Nightmare on Elm Street for example. Freddy Kruger is only in the movie for about seven minutes. Before the finale, all we get of Freddy is his voice or a few shots of him bathed in the shadows. It’s a very effective tool. At this point of the franchise, we don’t really know what Freddy is. Is he man or demon? We just don’t know.
The sequels change this up. After the second movie, Freddy stopped being the boogeyman and instead became the main character. You can even see this in the movie posters. The original two movies kept Freddy’s appearance minimal. From three forward, Freddy became the face of the franchise.
Certainly this diminishes his scare factor, right?
Wrong. While true the series became more comedic in tone later down the line, Freddy was still an intimidating villain. His ability to manipulate the dreamworld as he saw fit meant that he was always in control. This means that despite us knowing about Freddy Kruger and his powers, we still fear him.
Hannibal follows the same logic. Even though we the audience knows that Dr. Hannibal Lecter is a serial killer, that does not diminish the fear we have of him. In fact, I daresay it enhances the fear.
Those familiar with the movies and books know that Hannibal is a cannibalistic mass murder. A refined man who feeds upon the rude and kills when the mood strikes. It is this knowledge that enhances the show’s tension for now we are questioning every little thing Hannibal does.
For example; there are moments throughout season one where Hannibal invites the FBI agents to his home for dinner. The show makes it a point to show us the food he presents to his guests. Elaborate, delicious looking meals that belong in a five-star restaurant. It makes your mouth water as he explains the process in making each of these meals.
Until you remember where it came from. That is when the terror kicks in. As I said; we the audience knows he is a cannibal. The characters in the show, however, do not. So we watch in quiet horror as they eat the meat provided. Questions begin to form. Is Hannibal serving his guests human meat? No, he couldn’t possibly…
Then, as nonchalantly as talking of the weather, Hannibal says something to confirm our fears. Of course, the characters don’t understand what’s happening. But we do. We understand and we are horrified by that knowledge.
This is what I mean. While it is true that horror preys on the fear of the unknown; there exists moments where Knowing is scarier than Not Knowing. Season 1 of Hannibal is one of those moments.
Do you know of any other examples where knowing a character’s background enhances the suspense? Or are you a fan of the Hannibal series? Let us know in the comments! We’d love to read them.
Welcome to Tubi Tidbits where we discuss horror movies that I have watched but are either not big enough nor bad enough for a full-length review. As you read these micro-reviews, please keep in mind that everything said comes from my own personal preference. There are movies on this list that you may find more enjoyable than I did or ones you disliked more than I did.
That is the beauty of Horror. It is all subjective.
The goal of Tubi Tidbits is not to put a score on these movies per se, but to introduce you to new movies found on the Tubi Streaming App. There are literally hundreds of movies on Tubi and it can be quite difficult finding one you may like. Especially considering that a of of these were indie or direct-to-video releases.
So, while there is a scoring system in place, please do not take my word as law. I try to keep summaries and reviews for this segment tight and concise; enough to give you an idea of what you’d be expecting if you choose to watch these films.
With that said, please enjoy Tubi Tidbits!
Laid the Rest (2009)
What is it?
A woman with amnesia finds herself the primary target of a mysterious serial killer wearing a chrome skull mask. She teams up with a truck driver named Tucker and his best friend – a recluse named Steven. Now, the trio must keep themselves one step ahead of Chromeskull least they find themselves added to the growing number of bodies he leaves behind.
Review.
If I had to compare Laid to Rest with another horror movie, I would compare it to Damien Leone’s Terrifier. By this I mean Laid to Rest is about style more than substance. The story is razor thin and follows the usual slasher-movie fare. By which I mean it has a mysterious killer hunting down and slaughtering everyone and anyone he comes across while on his journey to find and murder his primary target. It really feels like the story primarily exists just to move our characters from Point A to Point B.
I wouldn’t say that is a negative. I feel like this movie was designed to showcase the effects rather than tell some kind of enthralling story. Where Terrifier was (in my opinion) made to show off the stellar performance of David Howard Thornton as Art the Clown, Laid to Rest feels like it was made to show off it’s fantastic practical effects. The kills are violent, and visceral – each one designed to outdo the last. I daresay that Chromeskull is probably one of the most brutal slasher villains I have ever seen. He kills without mercy and with maximum aggression – making every murder a work of practical-effects art.
Now I would like to take a moment to clarify something. I do not feel like this is one of those films that goes too far with its violence. This is not Martyrs or the Guinea Pig movies. It’s goal is not to disturb audiences but to provide them with bloody, gory good time. So if you are in the mood for a slasher movie with top-notch makeup and a hardcore killer than this is the movie for you!
I give Laid to Rest a 4/5
The Mutilator (1984)
What is it?
A group of college students spend Fall Break at a condo on the beach. What they do not realize is that the condo is also the headquarters for a deranged lunatic. With a wide variety of tools at his disposal, the lunatic decides to turn his attention on the students for trespassing on his property
Review:
On the surface you may dismiss Mutilator as another generic 80s slasher movie. And, to a certain extent, you’d be right. The story is as basic as it gets. Horny students using a remote location in order to drink and have sex. But what makes Mutilator different, to me at least, is the fact that the group feels like genuine friends. I cannot describe how many slasher movies have a friend group that has me wondering why they are friends to begin with. Such is not the case with Mutilator. The chemistry the cast has with one another makes their friendship feel real. As such I find myself rooting for the characters instead of counting down the time until their inevitable deaths.
Speaking of character deaths; that is where the movie really shines. For you see, the killer lives up to the movie’s title. He uses a wide variety of weapons including a boat propeller, a trident, and the titular fishing hook.
As such I would recommend Mutilator for those who want a good old-fashioned slasher movie. While it may not be as creative or as gory as other slashers movies of the decade, it is still an entertaining and fun watch.
I give Mutilator a 3/5
That is it for this episode of Tubi Tidbits! Please remember that the streaming service Tubi rotates their library regularly so if you don’t see these movies be patient. They will return to circulation soon enough.
We are not affiliated with Tubi in any way. These posts are strictly written as a way to inform other horror fans the selection that is available on this app.
Welcome to Tubi Tidbits where we discuss horror movies that I have watched but are either not big enough nor bad enough for a full-length review. As you read these micro-reviews, please keep in mind that everything said comes from my own personal preference. There are movies on this list that you may find more enjoyable than I did or ones you disliked more than I did.
That is the beauty of Horror. It is all subjective.
The goal of Tubi Tidbits is not to put a score on these movies per se, but to introduce you to new movies found on the Tubi Streaming App. There are literally hundreds of movies on Tubi and it can be quite difficult finding one you may like. Especially considering that a of of these were indie or direct-to-video releases.
So, while there is a scoring system in place, please do not take my word as law. I try to keep summaries and reviews for this segment tight and concise; enough to give you an idea of what you’d be expecting if you choose to watch these films.
With that said, please enjoy Tubi Tidbits!
BEN (1972)
What is it?
A lonely child named Danny befriends the hyper-intelligent, and very dangerous, rat Ben. Danny, who has been suffering from a debilitating disease, begins taking care of Ben and Ben’s ever-growing colony of sewer rats. When food becomes scarce, however, the colony grows violent. As the body count increases, the local police must rally together to hunt down and exterminate Ben and his colony of vicious rats.
Ben is a direct sequel to the 1971 Willard.
Review:
Ben has a surprising amount of heart for a movie about a killer rat. Child actor Lee Harcourt Montgomery plays Danny wonderfully; giving us a sympathetic character for whom we can root for. However, I daresay that the real star of the movie is none other than Ben himself. There is something about using real, trained animals that adds a sense of character to these rats. We believe that Ben is Danny’s friend, that Ben has Danny’s best intentions in mind, and we end up rooting for the rat just as much as the human cast. I cannot recommend this movie enough – especially for the ending’s climatic battle between and rodent!
I give BEN a 4/5
SLUGS (1988)
What is it?
A small rural town comes under attack when a species of black slugs are mutated by toxic waste. Now local health inspector Mike Brady needs to convince the local authorities that a swarm of man-eating slugs is on their way to infest the town.
Review:
Slugs is just another example of what made 80s horror movies so great. The idea is sill on paper but wonderful in execution. The slugs are surprisingly creepy especially when you see just how many of them are on screen at once. But what really sells the movie is its makeup and practical effects. Flesh gets peeled off from people’s bodies. Limbs are hacked off in grisly fashion. Eyes are gouged out, skulls are blown apart; the movie is just a wonderful gore-fest.
And sure, thee story is nothing special. We’ve seen the same idea in other creature-features. It is very similar to such films as Jaws, Ticks, and Grizzly but you know what? That’s okay. All that matters is if the movie succeeds in entertaining us. And thankfully it does!
I highly recommend this for anyone who enjoys 80’s creature features.
I give SLUGS a 4/5
That is it for this episode of Tubi Tidbits! Please remember that the streaming service Tubi rotates their library regularly so if you don’t see these movies be patient. They will return to circulation soon enough.
We are not affiliated with Tubi in any way. These posts are strictly written as a way to inform other horror fans the selection that is available on this app.
Hey everyone Mazer here and today we are talking about the peacock original series Twisted Metal. Specifically, episode one as it is the only one, I currently have access too.
Twisted Metal is a fast-paced, vehicular-combat game heavily inspired by the Mad Max trilogy. Co-created by legendary developer David Jaffe (God of War), it quickly became a cult hit that spawned several sequels including Twisted Metal Small Brawl and my personal favorite; Twisted Metal Black.
Gameplay consists of players taking control of a wide variety of colorful drivers and pitting them against one another in a battle-royale setting. What made Twisted Metal so much fun was that the battles did not take place in arenas but public spaces. You would battle through Los Angeles, Paris, even Antarctica. The world was your playground. And each game in the franchise raised the bar. We got more vehicles, more weapons, more arenas, and more chances to destroy everything in our path.
As the games evolved so did the combat. Every car played differently – some faster, some slower, some able to take more damage, some able to give out more damage, etc. Levels would become destructible – giving the players the ability to destroy buildings, Ferris wheels, and even airplanes. In Twisted Metal Black these destructible environments would give way to hidden areas which would almost double the size of some maps.
However, there was more to Twisted Metal than the combat. Like Mortal Kombat before it, Twisted Metal contains a shocking amount of lore and continuity. While several characters only exist within their specific game, there are those who survive and continue on. Most notably the Kanes; Charlie Kane, Marcus Kane, and Needles Kane. These three, along with Calypso, would play a pivotal part of the franchise’s storyline. And while I would love to do nothing more than talk about how their stories intertwine, I am here to discuss Twisted Metal’s latest in-CAR-nation; the Peacock Original Series.
This is our review of Twisted Metal Episode One.
[WARNING: SPOILERS]
WLUDRV
The episode begins with, what else? Narration.
Our narrator is John Doe and explains to us that a computer virus is responsible for wiping out all modern technology including the wireless communication, power grids, and even online porn. In order to protect themselves, cities around the country exiled their criminals before erecting gigantic walls around their borders. Those on the inside were stuck on the inside and those on the outside were stuck on the outside.
Now in order to survive the apocalypse the cities needed supplies. That is where John Doe comes in. He is a “Milk Man” – a driver who delivers supplies from one city to the next. John Doe has been a Milk Man for most of his life and he drives a heavily armored 2003 Subaru that he affectionally named Evelyn.
John Doe is good at what he does. He is an expert driver, a crack shot, and has survived more deliveries than most other Milk Men in his territory. This success has not gone unnoticed, however, as he is soon invited to a meeting with New San Francisco’s COO, Raven. She offers him a job; to go to New Chicago to pick up a package and deliver it to her within ten days time. In exchange, she will grant him citizenship to New San Fran. But if he is even a second late in the delivery, the deal is off.
John Doe agrees.
Meanwhile, along the Nevada Border, a purple hearse is desperately trying to escape pursuit of a heavily modified police cruiser. The hearse belongs to a pair of unnamed siblings played by Richard Carbel and Stephanie Beatriz while the cruiser is being driven by the relentless Agent Stone who is being played Thomas Hayden Church.
It does not take long for Stone and his deputies to destroy the hearse and capture the siblings.
Stone then explains that he is trying to restore law and order to the wastelands. And in order to do so, he will punish any crime, no matter how small, with extreme prejudice. He offers them a choice. If either one takes their own life, he will let the other go. The brother volunteers and quickly executes himself before his sister can intervene.
True to his word, Stone releases the sister but not before branding her with his sheriff’s badge. He warns her to stay out of trouble least she suffers his wraith a seco nd time.
Back in California, John Doe is seeking a map to New Chicago. He visits an old friend, a gas-station attendant named Tommy. Tommy provides John Doe with directions but warns him of the dangers waiting outside of California. The biggest of which being along his route in the city of Las Vegas. John Doe does his best to reassure his friend before venturing back out on the road.
He is able to make it to the outskirts of Vegas before being ambushed by the unnamed sister. She lures him out of his car at gunpoint with the intent of stealing his Evelyn in order to pursue Agent Stone.
He tries to calm her down but the sound of music interrupts him. And not just any music. It is the jingle of Sweet Tooth – a polka-dotted ice-cream truck driven by none other than the psychotic clown-masked killer Needles Kane (played by wrestler Joe Seanoa and voiced by Will Arnett). His maniacal laugh fills the air as the screen cuts to black and the credits roll. End of episode one.
Our Thoughts
Now what I say, I say as a hard-core fan of the Twisted Metal franchise. I absolutely love the direction the studio is going with this. They realized that Twisted Metal is an insane property that should never be taken too seriously. I mean, this is a franchise where a bunch of lunatics shoot at one another from inside crazy vehicles all in the hopes of getting their one wish granted by a burned man in a suit. The cast includes homeless men, killer clowns, race-car drivers, construction workers, a shadowy demon, the literal embodiment of death, taxi drivers, stoners, and in one game, a man in a gimp suit. The series has always had a twisted sense of humor to it and it is this humor that the show embraces like a straitjacket.
I mean, right off the bat we get a car chase that takes place inside of a God-Dang shopping mall. How Twisted Metal is that? Not to mention that the cars all look like they belong in the Twisted Metal universe – with armored plating, mounted machine guns, and rocket launchers on the roof. What I especially enjoyed was the colored smoke trail that came out whenever a rocket was fired. For those of you who don’t play the games, the missiles of Twisted Metal are all color coded; purple for homing, red for power, and orange for fire. It was a great attention to detail that I absolutely loved.
As far as the story goes; I am digging the apocalyptic take that the writers are going with. At first, I was skeptical about the whole ‘delivery man’ premise but it seems to work really well. It makes sense that the characters of Twisted Metal would be in control of their own territories. This way we can be organically introduced to them as time goes by. I am really excited to see who else John Doe runs into over the course of his journey.
Speaking of, let’s talk about the characters. Anthony Mackie is wonderful as the fast-talking John Doe. He is charismatic, charming, and a delightful smart-ass. He’s a fantastic choice for our main character and I really find myself rooting for him.
On the other side of the coin, we have Neve Campbell playing the COO of New San Francisco. At first I found her performance to be a little rough around the edges. However we soon discover that it is because she is pretending to be someone she is not. I still have some reservations about Neve’s performance but for now, I want to see more before passing judgement.
As for Thomas Hayden Church as Agent Stone and Stephanie Beatriz as the unnamed sister; I feel we don’t have enough screen time to judge either one of them proper. As of right now, Church seems to be nailing it as the corrupt Agent Stone whereas Stephanie is doing a good job at playing an angry, troubled person with a mysterious past. Hopefully both characters stick around so that we can get to know them a bit better. Only time will tell.
Finally let’s talk about the series’ mascot Sweet Tooth. I don’t know what kind of sorcery the showrunners did to pull Needles Kane from the games into the real world but they did it. He looks fantastic. Exactly like his video-game counterpart from Twisted Metal Black. His size, his movements, his mask; they are absolutely beautiful. I cannot wait for the next episode where I can enjoy Needles in all his live-action glory.
What we loved
Now if you’ll forgive me, I am just going to go on a little tirade on all the things I loved about the episode.
I absolutely love the car combat. While we didn’t get much of it, what we did see is on point.
Paying John Doe in car parts and weapons instead of money. It makes sense! What purpose does money serve in the wasteland.
It isn’t afraid of getting violent. Blood, guts, and gore baby!
The cars are BEAUTIFUL! Shadow, Outlaw, and Sweet Tooth all look like they came straight out of the video game. Even Eveyln, who is a new car, is wonderfully done.
The show seems to be mixing the dark humor of Twisted Metal 1 and 2 with the characters of Twisted Metal Black. Raven, John Doe, Agent Stone, are all characters in Twisted Metal Black. Whereas Sweet Tooth’s design comes from his Black incarnation.
The humor is on point and isn’t afraid of going dark.
Two words: Baby Seal
Despite being only 30 minutes in length, they did a great job creating a believable world that can exist in the Twisted Metal universe. I want to see more!
And there you have it. As it stands, I am very happy with how Twisted Metal is being portrayed. This is a franchise that never took itself too seriously and I am glad that the showrunners are playing up to the games’ tongue-in-cheek humor. Now let’s hope that the other episodes are just as strong. Stay tuned as we will be covering each episode as we watch them! Hope to see you then!
